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Coffee Talk #1 - 10.02.19

So I thought I'd try something new this year. As two of my favourite things are coffee and talking, I thought to myself, why not make a blog series about everything and anything! I feel like society today forces us down the train of thought that we MUST find our "niche" and it needs to be ours and no one elses. I have found myself spending hours in front of a screen asking, what exactly is my niche? What makes me unique and sets me apart from everyone else? The true answer for this, after a long contemplation, is that it doesn't matter. You have enough confidence to share your thoughts and opinions with the world and that is enough. You are enough. There is too much pressure on people these days about having to be busy 24/7 and have a to-do list that we must complete each day. But through time I have realised, so what if I don't produce 5 blog posts a week and post every day on Instagram. If I want to write about anything in a little series that I can look back on in years to come, I certainly will.

I thought I'd kick-start the series with something that has been on my mind for a while now. But first, pour yourself a good ol' cup of coffee (or tea, whatever floats your boat) and enjoy the beginning of Coffee Talk.

Recently, my lecturer has talked more about self-worth and purpose. Completely irrelevant to my course, but I can't help but really think about it after each class. He spoke to me one day, admitting that although he may go off on tangents about how we need to be less hard on ourselves as students, he has this burning desire to let his students know that it is going to be OK. When he means we need to stop being hard on ourselves, he means that if we receive anything below a 2:1 in our course, or any course for that matter, we should never define ourselves by that mark. That mark is simply where we stand in that moment in time and we have the potential to change that.

We as students, can get so worked up that we aren't 'good enough' or talented enough and end up with this obscene amount of stress on our shoulders. I say this because I myself, feel that way a lot of the time. We have to juggle this whole new independent lifestyle, learn new skills (and fast), learn to live with different people, try to have a social life as well as work our socks off to achieve the grade we want. Isn't that insane? This doesn't just apply for students, but also those who have landed themselves a job in a whole new environment. So, like I mentioned before, we need to really stop being so hard on ourselves. If you didn't achieve that to-do list today, and didn't feel the satisfaction of crossing everything off, so what? There is always another day to try again, and if that doesn't work, then try again. I know many of us have goals in life, goals each year or each month, but I find that setting goals and not accomplishing them can end up being hard-hitting, resulting in making ourselves feel useless. Yes, achieving a goal is an amazing feeling, but being able to find that balance between achieving goals and accepting you can't reach them, is a lot more rewarding. I found this lovely quote that I will try my hardest to live by:

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. Be perfectly okay with being who YOU are. Fully embrace yourself, flaws and all. Love yourself right where you are. Strive to do better, but don’t beat yourself up for every shortcoming that you may have. Be brave in your journey! Hold your head up high, and keep moving forward.”― Stephanie Lahart

I'm not really sure where I'm going with this blog post today, but hey, I'm not really complaining that I'm able to brain dump a whole load of stuff I wanted to get off in a while.

Due to the fact that I have been hard on myself a lot recently, I have to admit it has taken a bit of a toll on my mental health and behavior. I didn't think I would have the courage to share this but recently, I have found myself being quite nervy, resorting to picking at my face. I have this horrible habit now of picking at scabs, spots and scars. I have tried my best to keep busy and even tried using a fidget cube (lol) but still there have been times where I have sub-consciously picked at my face without realising. I have been contemplating different ways to try and combat this like focusing on self-care, which will hopefully help to subside through time.

Well, seeing as I have opened up about something not so positive, I thought I'd share a lil life update on the brighter side! I have been so thankful to receive a wonderful part-time job that has the best hours as a student! I get to work as a PA for a lovely lady who owns local beauty salons. This job couldn't have come at a more perfect time as due to the university term dates with a late January start, I had a week off where I was able to have an interview and an introduction to the job! Although I have only worked there for a few weeks (hence why the blog has been on hold as I wanted to take time and focus on my job) I can safely say I am loving every minute of it.

Well, that's all from me for now, however, I would definitely love to continue these coffee talks on the blog! This one seemed to be a little up in the air so maybe I will think about some ideas for next time. (One being to perhaps include some fellow bloggers in this series and do some collabs! If you are interested, drop me a lil message) I would really love some feedback and ideas on what you think too!

Coffee is getting cold, got to go!

Soph x

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